There’s no place like home for the holidays
I recently had a conversation with my three small children about our favorite Christmas songs on the radio. My eldest quickly identified the original “Winter Wonderland,” an interesting choice given the fact that he is a native Texan. The middle child picked “Last Christmas” by Wham!, if you were curious.The baby girl, now 6, picked a fan favorite from 1994, “All I Want for Christmas Is You.”
Mine is an oldie: “Home for the Holidays,” by Perry Como in 1954. It weeps with nostalgia for me – cold and dark Chicago winters, my great-grandmother’s nativity scene set up in her basement, snow and ice, the windows at Marshall Field’s on State Street, and last-days-before-break school field trips to the Museum of Science and Industry.
But those are childhood memories – the song has also carried me through early adulthood, living in different countries and different states. The song, if you’re not familiar, recounts cross-country holiday travel, naming various parts of the US and how it all comes together with the simplicity of pie, pine, and presents.
We all know this is not the reality for many of our neighbors, but we are somehow able to compartmentalize that knowledge away into the back corners of our minds while we go along with our celebrations. I’m not asking us to stop our holiday fun, for sure, but what are tangible ways we can remember, acknowledge, and support those who are not having the same experience as us?
The holiday break, specifically the time right after the 25th but before classes resume in January, ends up being a busy time for SafeHaven’s shelters. As I grow older, I realize there are only so many holiday breaks we will get in our one life – can you imagine spending one of them planning your exit from everything you know? Not just ending a relationship, but doing it in a way that ensures physical safety for you and your children?
When you’re sitting down at Christmas Eve service, lighting a pine-scented candle in your living room, or turning on a fireplace this year, please think about how all of these traditions are possible because you already own a wonderful gift: safety. You do these things without being afraid. Fear would ruin all of it.
The opposite of fear is calm. Calm can be achieved through the combination of courage and trust. SafeHaven tries our very best to build courage and trust with survivors, ultimately bringing calmness to a survivor’s heart. Home for the holidays can mean a physical home, but it can also mean a metaphorical one – one where calm resides.
It is our hope and work that survivors can all experience home for the holidays. And for those who are in this mission with us, thank you.
Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays,
Kathryn Jacob, LMSW
SafeHaven President and CEO